I think this story is very interesting, I also like the idea of this story and how you described how poor Jim and his family was, I think you should use more commas and I also spotted you repeat some words, I suggest you use different words in your story.
I think this story is very interesting, I also like the idea of this story and how you described how poor Jim and his family was, I think you should use more commas and I also spotted you repeat some words, I suggest you use different words in your story.
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